…Because Then She Shaved My Face… If you want a detailed list of the cosmetic procedures I’ve done to look baby-face fresh, you’ll have to read my memoir. Or at least skip to that chapter. Oh wait, details are sprinkled throughout. In that case, feel free to skim-read—though, you would be missing out on plenty […]
Deja Vu: The Mid-Life Weary-Go-Round Crisis.
What To Do When We Don’t Know What To Do. Warning: F-bombs. Yes, my vagina is fine, thank you for asking. A little lonely perhaps, but isn’t everyone? I decided to write this blog sober (but not somber) because I’m in a coffee shop, and the baristas don’t take well to drunkards stumbling around asking […]
There’s No Righting Rage On The Page. But He Shat Too.
Doest Not Shite Where Thou Doth Drink (Espresso). I wrote this a couple weeks ago but waited to post it. I didn’t want my fury getting the best of me. (Though, have you noticed that I do my best writing under this influence? Just sayin’.) Anyway, having allowed enough time to pass, I can safely […]
Pet Sitting Is For the Birds
goD Spelled Backwards is doG. Therefore, timmaddoG, I’m Not a Pet Person. Okay, I’ll admit my little Rent-a-Pet, cats- and dog-sitting deal was fun the first week. If you recall, my roomie is away for what is now seemingly foreverrrr. Anyway, I walk SashaMoto—I renamed her—twice a day and/or take her for hikes. I brush […]
A Conversation with God(ly People).
I wrote my last blog (the one about masturbation and dildos) before meeting the born again Christians (or is that Born Again?) for a three-hour lunch and chat, which sort of turned into a bible session—only without the Bible but with a lot of talk about our Lord God Almighty. (I’m sure referencing Him requires […]