#DepressionSucks(TheLifeOutOfMeAndYou) Hey! I wrote this some time ago and thought I’d posted it (somewhere), but I can’t find it, so here it is, possibly again. I’ll blame my memory loss on the pit I was in at the time. Depression messes with the mind and renders those suffering with it helplessly forgetful. That’s my story […]
On Cellulite, Chin Hairs and Calgary
Brené Brown says that when we share our shame randomly and indiscriminately we’re just looking for attention—and by “we,” I mean “me!” I say, “Shame on shame, baby!” Though, hmm, I’ll admit that some restrictions do apply, namely: if you’re a Peter-file, then maybe there should be some shame there. Or maybe not, I dunno, […]
How To Cure Depression With Snapchat! Episode 1
Depression Caused by Loss of A Loved One ― Namely, MLM… This is an impromptu post—I haven’t written in so long that I feel a little guilty. Well, not really. But whatever, I wanted to share some silliness in case it helps boost your mood. I started doing Snapchat for My Sister (and myself) after […]
And THEN I Became A Lesbian. Almost.
Almost, people! Almost! So I’m sitting at the take-out bar in Tacofino chowing down on a big-ass chorizo burrito and inadvertently eavesdropping on the convo next to me. I’m alone, so what else am I gonna do? Listen to the incessant thoughts roaming around in my mind? That’s been boring so far: Maybe I should […]
That’s How I Became A Phone Sex Operator. Almost.
My Terms and Conditions text reply … Payment in advance Paypal: mailto:findme@wingmam.com US$500/hr; min 1hr fee charged US$125/15 min after 1st hr (65/70/75min=$625; 80/85/90min=$750) By appt—24hrs; limited availability on weekends If you call w/o an appt & I answer, time & 1/2 Text only to make appt No personal questions about me No naughty comments directed […]
And Then I Went To L.A. For An Audition…
Before we get to the juicy bits—not my juicy bits, the juicy bits of this story—let us meander back to where this trip originated from … when I was 10 years old. If you read my memoir, you might recall the shyness-overtakes-me-again-dammit episode where I’m the star runner of track and field, and on the […]
An Apology From The Person Formerly Known As Anna J
I sent this to the editor of a local Comox Valley newspaper and they didn’t publish it. Maybe they thought me another recovering AA member looking for repentance. But, I’m not in Alcoholics Anonymous, because I’m not an addict (unless one counts shoes). I’m just a gal on a love mission. So, crazy or not […]
My Little Mom
Warning: F-bombs and bitchiness. You’ve been warned. I wrote this a couple months ago, before… 🙁 Was it Mercury Retrograde or the MSG or was it MLM (My Little Mom) fading fast that made me so fucking cranky? See, a swear in the first fucking sentence. (Though, I do feel a little better getting that […]
Because Everyone Loves a Trip to the ER in the Middle of the Night
ER Stands for: Exciting Ride, Right? Riiight? Sister’s home, 3:00am My sister wakes me from a delta sleep by touching my toe. Like that projectile vomiting girl in The Exorcist movie, I sit straight up with a start and gasp. My sister’s expression tells me we’re going to the hospital again, but that the situation […]
Kiss and Tell. Fuckit, Why Not?
People have different ways of dealing with the impending death of a loved one. Some of those ways might not be considered healthy, but I say if we can garner a laugh out of it—and walk away without STDs or too many bruises (inner or outer)—then, BAM, why the F not? Here’s how it went […]
