An Apology From The Person Formerly Known As Anna J
I sent this to the editor of a local Comox Valley newspaper and they didn't publish it. Maybe they thought me another recovering AA member looking for repentance. But, I'm not in Alcoholics Anonymous, because I'm not an addict (unless one counts shoes). I'm just a gal on a love mission.
So, crazy or not here it is. You may not be a person who needs an apology from me, but just in case...
There’s nothing like the death of someone we hold dear to make us stop and ponder life.
I recently lost My Little Mom. My brother, sister and I had the honour and privilege of caring for her at home and were by her side when she left this world for sunnier skies.
Not everyone has the opportunity to spend time with the important people in their lives while they can—or sometimes, we can’t face dealing with unresolved tensions.
Here we are. I’m making this an opportunity to make amends where I can.
To my family: I apologize for not being there for you while I was engrossed in my career (and ego).
To my friends (past and current): I apologize for unsolicited advice and self-righteous judgements with my self-help “expertise.”
To my exes: I apologize for being a messed-up jerk and hurting you.
To my business associates: I apologize for my impatience and/or indifference, often both.
To my past clients: I apologize for ever letting you down and for ever making you feel like more a number instead of a person.
To anyone else I ever slighted, didn’t see, disrespected, invalidated, was a little Miss Bossy Pants to or anything else that left you feeling crappy: I apologize.
I have nothing to sell you. I hope you can receive this and recognize my intention--to make amends.
If you would like to talk, please contact me.
What have I relearned?
I can't track down all the people who may have felt rightfully wronged by me, but maybe some of them will see this and find forgiveness or a little peace knowing I'm making an apologizing ass of myself.
Avoid doing shit that require apologies!